My Bestie just broke up with me. We have been friends for a year and a half and the relationship we had was not as strong as I thought it was. Apparently she thinks I am a bad influence on her and that my kids are teaching her kids bad habits. Here is the letter she wrote to me on FaceBook - she didnt even have the decency to do it to my face
:(
Noodle. I have some bad news. i chose to talk to you this way because i need to be able to say it all at once and be done with it. please understand.
After you left yesterday I found a few things the kids had gotten into and a princess castle they had broke. Grace of course told her dad and then when i put her to bed last night she said i Hate you, and when asked who taught her that she said Renee....i said when? she said she tells April and Aggie that all the time! i never thought anything of it but im realizing that our combined humor/cynicism is starting to affect Grace and Evans emotional development i dont want them saying things like that and yesterday when you said that April got her attitude from Grace it bothered me because Grace actually got it from Carson i dont know if you have noticed but its not really like i have any other friends or kids for her to play with, so anything they pick up goes around from chase to carson to grace to the girls and back to evan. you have told me in the past Carson says no and he dose cross his arms and get mad at you when asked to pick things up. He did this yesterday after agreeing with me to clean up the toys ,which usually grace will sing a song and do without any fighting so this is not open ended out of nowhere blame. i think the kids just get into too much when their here and its bothersome to me because i can let my kids play in their rooms and they DONT get into anything, and if we leave your kids alone in the bedrooms in my house they destroy toys, peel the decorations off my walls and get into things that i havnt ever had an issue with before with ANY other kids at my place. i dont think you notice but when something happens you seem to blame Grace and awful lot and if she dosnt have the whole story of what happened you think that because shes 3 she should know better when in reality shes only 6mos older than the girls shes not that much farther ahead in common sense that they are. she dose have feelings and i think after talking with her last night that it would be a good idea if you didnt come over anymore. i enjoyed our friendship but i cant put my kids in a position where even im stressed by your kids sometimes and i feel like after you have been around for a day or 2 that im hostile towards my kids and when no one is here they are good as gold but for some reason things that normally wouldnt bother me DO when your here. for example spilling the pop, it was nothing and were tearing the carpet out anyway so its not a big deal but pushing her aside is not the way to handle it and it was the way i handled it yesterday. its a pattern im noticing with myself after hanging around you. Ben and i also feels like our teaching and parenting methods should NOT be up for debate in our own home like for example yesterday at lunch you were telling us pointers on discipline and manners, neither of which your kids have much of you admitted this last week to me. and if he chooses to eat something different its HIS house and he can if he wants you dont share your candies and chocolate and pop with your kids do you? so all in all i just feel it would be best if we just didnt hang out. this has been on my mind for a while now since about April and now you atleast have 2 weeks to find a new buddy to go with you to the concert. i realize this will be upsetting but its how i honestly feel and trying to tell you in person dosnt work because we get off topic and i forget things. i just needed to air it out and explain all at once and get it over with. you now me i could have called or had you over but i didnt want you to think i was attacking you i wanted to be able to tell you where you could take the news in private. ill round up everything thing that belongs to you and delete your belongings from the adds. it will take me a day so ill drop your things by your place over the weekend.
sorry to have offended you or hurt your feelings i just cant hold it in anymore. Ben dosnt want you coming around anymore he dosnt like bantering with you and feels uncomfortable and angry when your here.
Noodle is my nickname. Now here is the back story. When I met her I was in a bad place with PostPartumDepression. We liked the same things, same music, we could make eachother laugh so hard pop came out our noses. She was my only friend and me hers. Her kids were like my kids and my kids were like her kids. We started hanging out slowly and after the nice weather hit I was always there or she was here. When she moved into a new house, closer than her old one, we didnt see eachother alot because she was working on trying to get a job and I had other things to worry about. ie: Chase. Anway, so we started hanging out more often again this April and May and because I am working on my discipline techniques I thought I would give her a few pointers. She had always told me that if she had a problem with something I did or said that she would tell me up front and we could discuss it. I THOUGHT she would do that, apparently she lied to me about that. I called her and asked her to call me and she wrote me back on FaceBook again. Here is the reply.
Im sorry but No, i cant call you. My decision is not open ended and is NOT up for debate. Please DONT come over and try to catch me at home, i wont answer the door. Lets just leave it at this. i dont want to be ambushed about my decision.
So not only does she hurt my feelings but she also does not let me defend myself or my kids. My mom asked me if this was the type of friend I wanted. As Im sitting here thinking about it, NO its not.
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